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Afraid

from Sanity Requiem by BK James

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I'm not afraid
To say I'm afraid

Saying all we have to fear is fear itself
Is like saying the worst part about dying
Is death

But I'm not afraid
To say I'm afraid

Afraid to fail
And afraid to fall
Afraid I've been derailed
And all
The drugs and alcohol
Caused my serotonin
Levels to drop so low
They'll never replenish
Going through the motions
Detached from the premise
Phoning it in from another dimension
I'm so pretentious
But when I look in the mirror I see only Blemishes

But I'm not afraid
To say I'm afraid

Afraid of a restaurant I ate at in a nightmare
It has no name but last night I was right there
I swear
It doesn't exist and yet I still care
Still cling to my despair
Still bitter I didn't get my share
But I won't do a thing
I wouldn't dare
I'm too scared

But I'm not afraid
To say I'm afraid

Every time I crawl out of the shadows
I find myself falling in artificial love
Which is bound to burn out quicker
Than the artificial sun
Oh, if only I wasn't so shallow
And you, being super superficial yourself
Well you made it all about yourself
And how can I say I don't doubt myself
When all I do is doubt myself?
It was always about myself
Now I bake all day in the artificial sun
But unfortunately when I wake
I ain't caked in artificial cum

But I'm not afraid
To say I'm afraid

Of dying alone
But then again who won't?
As I gaze through the smoke
I see a lonely throne
Or maybe it's a tomb

Afraid this vision will end soon
I'm afraid I ate too many mushrooms
I'm afraid I wrote too many looney tunes

And now I don't have much left to do
I'm afraid only death will save me from you

But I'm not afraid
To say I'm afraid

Afraid I've been on the same page for too long
Afraid I'll never move on
Afraid I'll never let go
Because from that first blissful second
I laid eyes on you
My love has been nothing but an echo

credits

from Sanity Requiem, released April 20, 2015

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BK James New Paltz, New York

BK James is the infamous co-founder of Three Penis Productions, an experimental music label, and has been steadily releasing music since a handful of BK & KGC songs appeared on Youtube in 2010. For more from BK, check out:

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