So it appears I smoked myself into a vegetable
Than I ate an edible
All my weed incredible
Impeccable medical
Sacks fatter than my testicles
If you wanna get technical
That's five blunts, three jays
Eight roaches in the ashtray
End of the day
I do what I say
Actually chiefin'
Accurate character
Grass ambassador
You amateurs smoke lavender
And daffodils
And I'm laughing' still
And this hashish I have to kill
Keep it real
I find a fried mind at high tide
You feel me?
I only feel real feelings when I'm high
Bring a dime
Income die, wisdom rise
you want the keys to the kingdom?
Fine

No time for questions
No time for second guessing
You'll never learn your lesson
I'm the one your hoe be stressin'
Hope she's present at my next erection
Ego death tonight
Tomorrow is the resurrection
Cuz if I wake up in the morning that's a motherfuckin' blessing
And If I go to bed sober that's fuckin' depressing
That's why I still scrape resin
Even though it tastes unpleasant
I know I'll never ascend to heaven
So instead I'm a puff puff the stuff till my sinuses plug up
Plug in, log on for some gutter smut
The dirt you smoke ain't worth bein' dug up buttercup
Just smoked a blunt, didn't get high, guess I'll go roll another up
I mean I'm kinda high, just need a reason to pass the time
And after I'm done getting high I'll go roll another up

I ain't got no tolerance
For incompetent
Pussy niggas with no tolerance
Pukin' after bong hits
Probably need a gynecologist
Years now I been fuckin' this whack world
Ain't used a condom yet
Lost my virginity to a fat black girl
Squirted her with my condiments
Guess I did pretty good for a slacker cracker rapper
Fat bastard and a half
You know that
Master at my craft
You know this
I don't smoke crack rocks
I smoke piff
But crack rocks
Is my cash crop
Ya broke bitch
I copped rolling papers from the head shop to roll shit with
And some cough drops so I don't choke when I hit it
I got a problem with pot and I openly admit it
Thought about quittin'
Decided to forget it
Fuck permission
I'm a smoke and sin till my brain splits open
And I won't ever ask to be forgiven
New Paltz bud game on the grid kid
This the town I live in
And in spite of my supposed intelligence
I'm still smokin' that Newport menthol same color that the grinch is
I swore I'd be more
And I came within inches
Touching from a distance
Further all the time
I only liked weed cuz it helped me unwind